My handsome hubs!

My sister wrote an amazing post the other day about how what you look for in a boyfriend/mate/significant other changes DRAMATICALLY somewhere along the line as you near 30.

You can read her blog here: the-real-turn-ons-of-an-almost-30-something

My sister is pretty funny, so just promise me you won't abandon my blog after you find out about hers...no seriously, I think I need confirmation in the comment section that you won't ditch me for her...my ego can't handle it.

Annnnyywaysssssss...insecurity aside, I was talking and laughing at my husband this past weekend.  We always discuss with each other our past, present, and future.  I think it helps us to realize just how far we have come in life...which in our eyes seems pretty amazingly far.

When we were first dating, we laugh about the things that were concerns of ours.  Our image of what our life would be has been ripped up and altered so many times.  To some, we may not seem to have been together long, but to us it seems like forever (don't worry...in a good way).  We met at 18 years of age.  At 30, we have been together for 12 years, married for 8.  That is a long time when you realize how close you are to having known each other for half of your life.

Well, back when we were dating some of the sweetest things that  Reid could do for me was hold my door open and take me out to dinner.  Flowers sent me over the moon.  Let's be honest, at 18 to 20 I think most girls are in an unbeknownst competition of whose boyfriend loves them more.  Anything that is public got bonus points, and don't get me started how great we felt if someone commented on how great our guy was to us.  Thank goodness Facebook didn't come to our campus until I was a Junior in college, because I would have gushed it up.

Moving on, when we got married, things like my husband cooking dinner for me was magical.  You mean that we both worked hard today and you want to do something sweet for me and be the chef?  AWESOME!  I think that the newly married also needs to feel like they "haven't lost the romance" as well.  I had a deep need to still go on dates and get flowers occasionally to make me feel like we were still "hot" for each other.

Fast forward to modern day.  Now let me preface things by saying I COMPLETELY AND UTTERLY have the hots for my husband. Even after a kid things (trying to not be obscene) have stayed intimate.  Our roles have changed a lot over the last year with him working at least 12 hours a day AND coming home to study and prep for his next flights.  Since I am not working we have an understanding that I do most of not all of the housework.  I don't mind, because honestly I LOVE not working and getting to play with my boy all day.  Feminists probably hate me because nothing would make me happier than to dress up like a 1950's wife and cook all day (well sort of).

So what makes my day now?  Guys I even shocked myself.  Reid walked into the kitchen on Friday after a very long work week and started washing the dishes without being asked.  WHOOOO...calm down Lauren, but this is hot!  Well he was laying it on thick and not only washed one load, but 3 loads of dishes.  Oh my gosh, calm down...he is not only helping me, but is listening to me and a implementing a conversation we had 3 weeks ago!  WHAT...that ladies and gentleman is what does it for me after 12 years together.  MY husband listened to me and implemented my requests of him.  Oh and he didn't stop there, he played with our son all weekend and talked to me about what he was thinking without me trying to drag information out of him.

Maybe you are thinking "Lauren, why is any of this special?".  Well perhaps to the normal person you think "He should do all of that"...but the pilot wife knows that this kind of stuff is huge.  It's math...there are 168 hours in the week.  These guys in pilot training are in class for 12 hours a day 5 days a week minimum, so now we are down to 108 hours left in the week.  These boys HAVE TO get 8 hours of sleep, because no one wants a pilot to be screaming through the sky and fighting to fall asleep.  We are now down to 52 hours left in the week.  People need to eat, so lets say 2 hours a day is spent eating, leaving us with 38 hours left this week.  Then he needs to study at LEAST an hour a night and like 5 hours on Sunday, leaving us with 25 hours.  So basically we are left with an hour together on weekdays and usually Saturday spent together.  So my husband has 1 hour of free time and CHOSE to do dishes for me.  Get it?  When hubbies has a minute to himself and chooses to spend it helping me out, it melts your heart.

Things have definitely changed over the years, and all of those changes make me fall more and more in love with this man that I call my husband.

Does anyone else get to the end of my blog and think, how the crap did we come to this solution from when she began typing?  Don't worry me too...blogs are more therapy for the writer than the reader I think sometimes anyways.  Recap: my husband is awesome and "just gets me" even after all of these years.  Even after we are old and the kids are gone, we will still be going strong, hoping to gross the kids out that we still have the hots for each other!

Waiting for Benny-Boo-Boo

Reid truly and utterly hates that Mason and I call our future son Benny-Boo-Boo.  It started as a joke one day when I was walking Mason through some ways of how he could help me out when Ben comes, using his little Ben doll.  However, the crazy look that Reid gets in his eyes when Mason still calls our future son Benny-Boo-Boo is something that even that 3 year old knows is hilarious merely because we like it and daddy doesn't.  Mason gets me, he is my mini-me and we equally enjoy pushing Reid's buttons as a team.  I think it scares Reid how much me and my boy are alike, which has only spiraled out of control since we spend every waking second together since moving to Oklahoma.

But we are still waiting for our Benjamin Levi, our little Benny-Boo-Boo.  Waiting NOT so patiently either.  I have nested this house into a frenzy, throwing away and selling off anything that we do not need.  I have even finished Mason's 4th Birthday party an entire MONTH in advance, because I was so afraid that we would get a call about Ben and wanted to make sure that Mason didn't miss out on his special day.  However, now I feel like a crazy person because every time I call to find out our status, I feel like another puzzle piece is placed between my son and our family.  Nothing new or unexpected, (whining voice) "BUT I AM READY NOW!"

The wait ~ I am not a patient person and can whip some paperwork out in less than 24 hours to complete a dossier or requirement.  But we are not on my schedule or speed...we are working at "normal" people's paces...which apparently means at least 2 months to complete paperwork.  So I am sitting NOT so patiently in line behind people working at normal paces, when all I want to do is drive to these people's houses and pick then up and shuttle them around until they are done and me and my son can be united.  I guess what hurts so much is the fact that there are so many kids out there that need families and somehow I have to sit on my hands trying to look graceful as I wait.

The nesting ~ Seriously I finished a birthday party an entire month ahead of time because honestly it helped pass the time as we waited.  However, now I look like a giant pile of crazy when people come over and Mason's party supplies are laid out across the tables, walls, and shelves.  Now I am not talking normal human parties, I am talking Tori Spelling style...like I made each child their own super hero towel capes this week.  Custom treat containers, banners, backdrops, and food signs.  My husband says my parties are psychotic...he won't even allow me to throw him a party anymore because his last one I turned the entire house into a Mario game:

Apparently, there was a line for adult parties and I crossed it...I am totally not sorry and the crazy only builds, so it is being forced upon Mason's party instead.

The nesting in our house has been extreme as well.  Mainly because the house has been so clean this last month.  I am not a great cleaner, but the idea of having a little baby crawling around my floors has definitely lit a fire under my butt about keeping everything clean and spotless.  Carpets have been shampooed, dishes washed the same day, I even reset the couch cushions and pillows every morning when I wake up.  Our house has kind of felt like we were staging it to sell.

Ugghhh...you want to know my badge of crazy secret...if you didn't already know I was a pile of crazy you will soon...I already have Ben's car seat ready and latched into my car!  Seriously, I drive around with it in the car all set up because somewhere in my gut I hold onto the hope that I will get a call to pick him up any time now.  Want to know why that is stupid?  Well because the company hasn't even called me for my homestudy yet. Not sure what that means, well they haven't even officially signed off on placing a child with us.  We are in the "pre-approval" process waiting on the chance for the "final approval" when we will be matched.  I drive around with a perfectly coordinated car seat waiting for my baby.  Doesn't this company know how awesome I am and just let me jump past everything and grab any kid I want?  No, oh...well then I will sit here on my hands and go clean my house again.

The heart ~ so I read this amazing article tonight through Pinterest: dear-friends-of-waiting-adoptive-moms that I thought did a really good job of explaining how to love on someone that is going through adoption...because honestly most times we feel like the world looks at us like a giant ball of crazy...bouncing on the balls of our feet, because our hearts are already at the finish line with that baby and somehow we have to keep it together back at Step 3 of 10 with a smile on our faces because we will scare you if we drop all of the information of where we are in the process and how we are really doing with it.  It can be so frustrating because the time frames are not up to us.  Also because we feel like people don't know how to handle how quickly things change in adoption and once again feel like we are the ones who look crazy as we latch on to the next piece of hope only to have it change 2 days later.

Public service announcement...your friend is not crazy because the plans she shares change every time you talk to her...she is excited about her child and any possible avenue that brings her closer to that child will be explored, even when each new avenue ends up being a dead end...at least chasing down that possible movement is the chance to be closer to that finish line in a rather stagnant process.

Somehow my heart feels better after my ramblings and the insomnia is starting to fade (2:00 am authoring going on right now).  Benjamin Levi Hottel...I am ready and waiting for you...and I will never let you go!

Ben's Room

Ok, so when you are adopting, you don't have anything but paperwork to remind you that you will one day have a baby in your arms.  Paper pregnant never makes me feel like things are real.  I assume every adoptive mother has her "thing" that she does to get ready for the soon to be baby.  For me, I decorate my kids nurseries.  For some reason if I have the babies nursery in place, then the reality of the new kid feels more real.  Reid thinks that I am completely crazy for doing this each time we adopt, but is afraid of me enough to let me do my "thang".  He figures if it calms the crazy, then why the heck not.

So, in February we had a preschool room, and I knew I would need to make some changes before Ben got here to make it a nursery.  I think it took me all of 2 hours to dismantle the room to 4 white walls and carpet.

Here is the room before

So we decided that since we were in pilot training that we (obviously me because Reid could care less) thought a plane themed room would be fun and very appropriate for where we were in life.
With me not working Reid was pretty apprehensive of me decorating this room in a way that would allow us to still eat.  He challenged me to use what we already had around the house, especially since we had so much stuff in our garage not being used.  Lucky for that man, Enid Oklahoma does not offer much in decorations outside of Wal-Mart.  This forced me to get creative and it ended up being so rewarding to not just decorate, but design.

When we packed up our house in North Carolina, we decided to bring the crib and changing table shrink wrapped for the "just in case".  Already owning the major pieces of furniture helped the process along quite nicely.  Ben is using all of Mason's nursery furniture and it is really nice to see those items in the room.  Mason is surprisingly ok with Ben having his old stuff.

So we placed the furniture in the room, but it all seemed so bare.  Mason had a full mural in his room, but in base housing, this was not realistic for us.  I spent a long time on Pinterest looking up ideas and decided a photo wall would be nice, and then I could create some of the pictures on my silhouette machine.

 Mason and I made a trip out to the Thrift Shop in Enid and bought all their fun frames.  We also scoured our garage and found some plain wicker baskets that we had never used, but I got a "really good deal" on them so obviously my hands were tied to buy years ago.

 We split up the frames and baskets at random and bought spray paint.  I am not very trendy, but went with some bold colors: orange, navy, and teal for a color scheme that I could incorporate into everything.

 After about 4 weeks the grass grew back in and no longer had teal and orange splotches in it.

The house was slightly unusable as things dried.  

We also spray painted paper lanterns in the matching colors, the same 2 spray paint colors on everything to ensure I didn't wind up with 12 shades of teal that would clash horribly.  

Mason and I then made a trip to Hobby Lobby to find papers that would match our color scheme and  then dispersed them somewhat randomly, some what strategic.  We looked up different plane designs and this was the one part Reid got interested in.  The fact that I had found a T-6 style plane made him fall a little more in love with me I think.  Once the planes were approved, we cut them out and placed them on the wall for our baseline of the decorations. 

 

Testing out the papers and making sure they coordinated together.

 All 4 custom pieces on the wall.

 A heart in Oklahoma, Ben's birth state.

 Benjamin Levi around the T-6 silhouette.  

 Ben already earned his wings way before daddy.

Then 2 old school fighter bi-planes.  

Here is the wall mostly with the addition of a mirror, F-22 Raptor pictures from Uncle Syd, and some other plaques and empty frames to add pictures of us with Ben.  

We got extra scrap book paper along with cardboard letters "BENJAMIN" to place over his bed.  

 We spaced out color and design and came up with this.  

I mod-podged these and then used a nail file to shave the edges equally.  

Now that I had an idea for the direction I was going, I ordered navy sheets for the crib.  I don't really like using the store pre-bought sets because then my kid has the same room as someone else, but I do love coordinating items.  I only but dark sheets for baby.  I didn't want a set of cute sheets that ended up with a brown stain the first time baby had a blow out.  Navy should cover up poo brown nicely.  I ordered a soft orange blanket to tie the colors together.  

We got a bookcase for free on the Vance Yard Sale page and filled it with all of Mason's old board books.  Mason is wasn't too sure how he felt about Ben getting his books, but was ok with the idea that he could pick which book to read to Ben.  As you can see by the book shelf, I may have bought Mason quite a few board books...I don't really like reading the same books over and over.  

 We got a set of sheer teal curtains and spray painted a coat rack.

 Then we placed the spray painted wicker baskets on the changing table.

So you ready for the full reveal yet?

I am going to make you work for it...

Insert a cute picture of Mason practicing being a big brother to hold you over...

AND NOW, HERE IS BEN'S ROOM~!

 

I hope you like it, I will try and post some more recent photos with a few more updates and awesome-tastic pieces that I have found since the last photos!

Our Adoption...and the Q&A's most people have been wondering

So I haven't blogged in oh, about 3 months.  This is 90% due to the fact that about 3 months ago we started this adoption journey and every time I thought about blogging, all I wanted to do was shout from the rooftops that we had decided to adopt our son Benjamin.  Since my husband asked me to wait I wrote about nothing.  I kind of felt like the phrase "if you have nothing nice to say, say nothing at all"...except for me it was "if you can't keep you and your husbands secret, then don't write about anything".  They are sort of the same things right?   No...so I just took pictures of everything and set them aside for many a blog later.

So, here we are and I can finally talk about it.  I realize that adoption is not something that many people are familiar with.  Everyone has someone they know who adopted, but not many people have been in the trenches with a couple as they ventured through this journey.  Reid and I have always hoped to be very transparent with people about our journey of adoption.  We have gotten many questions and I realize many may be wondering the same things.

What age will the child be?  We will be getting an infant.  This is very different from Mason whom we brought home at 11 months old.

Where will the child be from?  Our son will be from Oklahoma.  This will be a domestic adoption.

Why did you choose a domestic adoption?  We found out that Oklahoma had a large need for placement of children.  A woman at church actually was talking with me about the need and I tried to ignore it.  After 2 weeks of a nagging feeling I told Reid about the information and he told me that for 2 weeks he has been thinking about adopting a son domestically.  We had ruled it out before, but of course we can not change God's plans for our life.  So we started researching and decided to adopt our son here in Oklahoma.

So when will you get a kid, what is the process?  We are enrolled with Catholic Charities in Oklahoma.  Apparently we are high on the list due to when we got our application in and our search criteria.  However we are waiting for our file to be matched with a potential family.  Once we are matched we will then do our home study and meetings.  Then we will get a call that the child is being born and meet our little guy.  We will not bring him home immediately, but wait a few days until the child is officially an orphan.  Then we will drive and pick up our baby.  We don't know when we will get the call, but will most definitely be posting for prayers as soon as we do.

How did you choose the name?  So, we had already named our 3 kids before we even got Mason back to the USA.  I honestly chose kids names based on the kids I have interactions with as a teacher/director.  There are many names that are completely off limits.  Our sons name will be Benjamin Levi.  I couldn't figure out a name, until my sister Tracy and I were eating lunch one day.  Our waiter was named Benjamin and I told Tracy that I really liked that name.  I don't think we had any Ben's at our school ever that I could think of.  We have had some Ben's on our life growing up and they were always such good kids.  So awesome Benjamin it was.  But a middle name escaped me.  Reid and I started re-watching Chuck, with Zachary Levi and "ding" the name fell together.  We LOVE Zachary Levi, like Reid will watch Tangled because Zachary Levi voiced the hero.  And Levi flows so well with Benjamin.  So, sorry Ben, your name does not have a cool background or historical and family meaning.  It just sounded awesome and you deserve an awesome name because you are going to be AMAZING.

What will Ben's nationality be?  We signed up for all nationalities.  Black, Caucasian, Asian...we honestly don't care.  The only thing we know is that he will not be American Indian unless the child has under a certain percentage of heritage.  We want to give a home to a child who does not have a home.

Is this an open or closed adoption?  We chose to have a closed adoption.  This is partially due to the fact that we will be moving with the military.  Maybe it is the unknown of the situation.  Would the family want a say in our decisions.  Would they be ok with our moving?  And what do we tell Mason about why he doesn't get to have contact with his family, but Ben does.  We just couldn't get over the feeling that honestly, we didn't know if we could handle an open adoption, so it was better for us to be honest with the organization and ask for a Closed adoption.  We will most likely meet Ben's birth mom and send her pictures through our company and even help Ben find her one day if he so wishes to meet her.

I thought you were adopting a little girl, Kairi?  Yes, we are still adopting Kairi, but every time we turned around or talked to a company about adopting our daughter, nothing felt right.  We could cut corners to get things done and get our daughter, but realized that wasn't God's plan.  We fell in love with China at a young age and their people and always wanted to adopt from there.  We got a chance while in China to spend many days with the missionaries 2 adopted children.  I had never seen Reid melt more with kids prior to Mason.  So we want to start the process for Kairi as soon as Benjamin is placed in our home.  China's process takes a few years minimum, so Ben will probably be at least Mason's current age when we bring our baby girl home as well.

How much does an adoption cost?  This is one of those subjects that no one wants to talk about.  OH NO, not money...it makes me uncomfortable.  Not much makes me uncomfortable, so here we go.  The adoption for Mason cost around $40,000 with all the travel and everything.  We have just recently paid that off after savings and fundraisers and loans and getting tax refunds...and lots and lots of credit card payments.  Ben's adoption is going to be $15,000.  We have saved around $6,000 over the last year, which I think is pretty awesome considering we are a single income family now.  We will keep saving and fundraising, like our awesome missions shirts: Adoption Shirts.  In adult and kids sizes...WHAT?  I know...it is awesome and you can have one.

So what now?  We wait, somewhat patiently...as patiently as a mama bear can while she waits for her little cub to come into the safety of her arms, her home, and her life.  Mason has been practicing like a boss to other little kids.  He is so precious to me the way he cares for little kids is amazing and melts my heart.  He asked me for a little brother for so long and now he will have one.  He even goes into his nursery and plays with our pretend "Ben" baby doll by putting him in the Bumbo or play mat and eventually puts him back to bed when he leaves the nursery.  And Reid is excited, but let's be honest has pilot school to keep him plenty occupied while we wait.  And now we wait.

Next post will be Ben's nursery hopefully and the transformation that was made.

Crafty Momma

I have been crafting up a storm the last few days.  There are lots of things that I like, but am not willing to spend the money on OR things that I want and can not find anywhere.  The solution...CRAFTY MOMMA to the rescue.

Don't wanna spend the $$$$ ~ So I have been dying to finish Mason's room, but short of buying a $200 mural that probably won't be able to be reused, I needed other options.  We have a Star Wars theme because, let's be honest I LOVE STAR WARS.  What better idea is there than forcing your loves upon your child in hopes that they will love them too.  We had been prepping Mason in all things Star wars before we ever moved to Oklahoma.   Mason was excited for this room, that honestly doubles as fulfillment of Reid and myself's childhood wish. I had 3 walls done, but kept getting stuck on this one blank wall.  I found a mural on Amazon for $150 plus shipping, but the more I read about it, the less I felt like it would remove from the base housing walls.  There is no way I was spending that money for less than a years decor...well, no way I could convince husband to spend that kind of money especially for such a short time.

Here is the space from the first day:

This is the definition of a blank slate.  I am actually quite startled when I look back at this photo and see how far this house has come.  The biggest addition was a kids loft bed that we bought the boy because A.) it is totally cool and 2.) once again fulfills something I wanted as a kid.  

He loves this bed and the railings solved our problem of the kid falling out of the bed.  We added some shelves around the room and other storage and eventually got to this point:

We covered the bed in 2 flat sheets and then put a bathroom organizer behind his bed for storage.  IKEA shelf with wall stickers from the Falanga's.










My favorite thing is displaying all of our Star Wars treasures that Reid and I have been collecting over the years.  We even slapped a Vader mask over a regular lamp to theme it up.

 

 And then we have our shelves with Phineas and Ferb and friends to watch over the boy as he sleeps.


I have more fun with his rooms than any other.  So, I still had my blank wall left to work on and finally came up with a solution.  I have been saving Mason's Star Wars clothes ever since we got him in hopes of using them for something one day.  Reid found a bunch of canvas' that I had stored away and so the plan came together.  I cut his old shirts up and wrapped them around the canvas.  Luckily K.C. had bought a staple gun the other day, so I was set.

I love being able to display his childhood in this fun way.  I mixed the canvas' with some masks that I bought for costumes and a clock to create this:

His room finally came together and I love it.  We got the shelf from a girl on base for free that was moving to complete the room.  Crazy fun being a Crafty Momma this week.  I will post my other Pinterest project later in the week! 

Hyper Planner Extraordinaire!

So I have had a hard time coming up with anything clever or fun to post for a while.  I was gonna do some grand Christmas post, but a few facebook pictures told about as much as I could have.  But I have recently become quite obsessed with something that is happening in 3 months.

I AM GOING ON A DISNEY FANTASY CRUISE FOR MY 30th BIRTHDAY!

AHHHHHHHHH...I am so excited.  I have been planning for this before I ever went on our 1st Disney Cruise on the Dream.  Like seriously, Reid ran across the paper where I could have saved him $1,000 if he had just listened to me and booked on the ship.  That was a fun little gloat fest I had with that one today.

So when I get ready for a trip I plan for months.  We had an absolute blast on our last trip and I studied up before we left and knew more than many seasoned cruisers.  I travel like a pro and are honestly able to enjoy myself a lot more knowing that I have planned for all scenarios.  So it is no doubt that I have been at it again and started studying up on their Fantasy ship.

Last year I bought gifts for Mason before leaving home to avoid a $35 mickey purchase and honestly got items that people on the ship were lusting after.  I already got him a mickey jacket this time for cold nights as well as a mickey bookbag for the boy to bring his coloring books and story books with him.  Now that he is so giant I ask him to carry whatever he wants...no more getting bored with an item and handing it off to mommy.  I racked my brain about what other stuff I could get him, but if you saw his 3rd birthday party, you know that there isn't anything else that is possible to buy him.

 




So I decided rather than buying a 12 more mickey characters or shirts, that I would participate in Fish Extenders (FE).  Now this is gonna sound like a bag of crazy when I explain what I signed up for.  Beside every door on the ship is a sea creature (usually a fish) so a lady thought up adding bags to the fish and doing a gift exchange.  It has completely taken off and gone Disney magic crazy.  People sign up for these groups and make presents for the other cabins that sign up and drop them off in the other people's FE.  It is supposed to be a lot of fun.  I figured Mason would love getting a ton of little tiny things throughout the trip rather than just mommy bringing some stuff fir him.

Well our group for FE is AMAZING.  They like Star Wars about as much as I do...like people dressing their kids up like Luke and Leia for dinner.  We are going to be at Sea for May the 4th be with you.  Really I was sold after this, and these people will be my peeps easily.  I think this is what we will look like below:


So I made my Fish Extender and I think it rocks if I do say so myself.

So now I am just twiddling my thumbs as I await the items I ordered from China to make my FE gifts for the other cabins.  Disney gives you phones to use on the ship so you can keep in contact with your family...because they are geniuses.  So last time the one thing I didn't have was a way to carry my phone around, so I am making wave phone holders for all of the cabins.  I think they are pretty freaking awesome.  I got little bags, plus Mickey key rings and Mickey ribbon for decor on the side.  I think they will be pretty darn cute if I do say so myself.